On Destiny

Believing in destony implies an acknowledment that I am weak, waeponless and passive.

Do I belive in destiny or do we have the power to shape our own future, does the control lie in our own hands or in an invisible force.

I believe that each of us has certain personality traits which we really can't change.
Wether we are talkative or shy or witty or sarcastic or lazy or materialistic or spiritual.
It's all formed so early in life it's almost like we were born that way.

And then there are things which happen to us. Events. Again beyond our control.

Our reactions to these events is what shapes our future. Are these reactions really ours. Our reactions/ decisions are based on our inherent personality traits. Ya those same one we were almost born with. So all the choices we make or don't make our really already decided .

So do I belive in destiny?

Crowded

Why is it that I can never do just one thing at a time?
When I am putting on my shoes why do I also look for the car keys?
Why does my mind race into various directions while watching my favourite tv show?
While driving to work why do I reach out for my phone?
Why do I have to fill every empty minute of every day with something?
Why can i not manage to slow down?

fundamental ?

why do bulls charge when they see red when they are actually color blind?

some thinking on relationships

we are always looking for the balance in relationships.

often we find relationships not in equilibrium and think that they are not balanced. well they are balanced as in they have settled to a position. the position is usually not one of equilibrium.

it is much like a see saw. the person who can change the situation with the least amount of effort is the person at the bottom. he is the person in control. responsible for letting the other person enjoy what is commonly seen as the superior more exhilarating position.

this discovery to me is quite comforting.

The Talk

Anushka is sitting on the almost famous steps. In a foul mood. Staring at the ground and so does not quite notice when Ajitabh comes and sits besides her. She is already late for class and so collects herself and is about to move when she realizes his presence. He nods his head and raises his eyebrow questioning her to stay. She sits back and wonders to herself why does she relent.
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He gave her her name. Anush. When she was 21 . And then the whole world started calling her that. Suddenly. Just like that. Including her family. Her best friend.
She would wonder why it would have to take 21 years for her name to be distorted to an obvious endearment.
Why it would be him, someone with no defined relationship in her life. No not even a close friend.
She still wonders.